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Archive for the ‘WTF?’ Category

Hey Tank – We Got You A Snack

Sunday, July 20th, 2014

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Mudge Smash Monday – Words Dumb People Use To Make Themselves Sound Smart

Tuesday, July 15th, 2014

Let’s face it, throughout our military careers we have run across those that misuse words, or worse yet, use made up words, to make themselves sound smarter. Mudge gets annoyed when someone says “orientate” as in , “once you get off of the cattletruck, properly orientate yourselves and then move out in a military manner.” Wouldn’t it be much easier to just say, “get off the truck, figure out where you are, and then get moving to the next objective.”

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As another example, while I’ve never had the nerve to tell Mudge that it would “behoove” him to do anything, I’m sure he’d get a little angry over that one and trust me, you won’t like Mudge when he’s angry.

Which military words, terms and phrases, real or imagineered, get under your skin?

Look! It’s a GI Jo-Jo Size Action Figure

Sunday, July 13th, 2014

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At Warrior East I ran across a gi Jo-Jo size CSO action figure with the Kung fu grip. For size reference, the guy standing next to the figure is 5’6″ tall. Known as a “pocket-sized operator” he is dressed in the latest kit including woodland combat shirt and six concealed knives and handguns. Notice the jaunty angle the he wears his helmet, rocking it John Wayne-style with unsnapped chinstrap (Sands of Iwo Jima!). Under the helmet is the signature high and tight combover. Available with “I’ve got mine” smirk. Not shown: oversized dive watch, “MARSOC 1911″ and Force Recon Association lifetime membership card.

Order yours today!

No Wonder They Lost – A Revisit

Wednesday, April 30th, 2014

We recently posted photos from our trip to the Airborne and Special Operations Museum, and in the comments section, one of our readers asked what the deal with the “…Darth Vader looking Republican Guard helmet” was. Way back in 2009, we ran a brief article on the helmet, which was worn by Sadaam’s “elite” Fedayeen forces. Since it has been asked, it’s now perfect time for a revisit.

Some of you may remember the Darth Vaderesque helmet worn by troops in Sadaam’s “elite” Fedayeen forces. Apparently manufactured from fiber glass it saw only limited issue. Perhaps the idea behind the helmet was to make the enemy pause to say, “WTF?” giving the wearer enough time to run away. A badge with the words “The Lord, The Homeland, The Leader” was affixed to the side of the helmet. They bring top dollar in the collector’s market.

Iraqi "Vader" Helmet

A Spanish collector’s site has an excellent backgrounder on the helmet. Check it out here.

Listen Up

Monday, February 17th, 2014

It’s “Clothing Sales Store”; there’s no “and” in the title. Doing so is the military equivalent of putting an “x” in the word “asked.”

If you call it clothing and sales on SSD prepare to be belittled.

That is all…

It Was Bound To Happen

Wednesday, February 12th, 2014

You may remember in “Batman: The Dark Knight” that the Joker arises as an evil to counter the good of Batman. And so it goes. Good must have bad, dark have light, winter its summer, and on and on. Now, it’s come to Facebook which spawned Operator as F***, a page that amassed a whopping 150k ‘likes’ in the span of months with its jovial attempt to take the piss out of being serious. But it was only a matter of time before someone created its opposite.

AAF

It’s real all right.

www.facebook.com/aakbaraf

More On The Tactical Chaplain

Friday, January 10th, 2014

Turns out, the Tactical Chaplain who recently reached out to a prominent tactical gear producer for T&E samples, actually represents ‘usasoc’ not ‘USASOC’. It looks as though ‘usasoc’ is a “Christian men’s ministry serving the special operations community” that is based in Quantico, Virginia. Considering this, I’m not even sure at this point if he’s actually even in the service.

Yes, we know who he is now, and no, we aren’t going to share his name publicly. I’m not one to undermine confidence in the clergy. Not when guys like this work so hard to do it to themselves. However, if you are in industry and have been contacted by a Tactical Chaplain from usasoc or for that matter anyone with a usasoc.us email, hit me up and I’ll verify the name.

This just gets better and better.

Tactical Chaplain Ain’t Got Time For That

Friday, January 10th, 2014

We’ve recently posted a few articles about companies being approached by bloggers and service members alike for “test items.” Naturally, this opened up the flood gates of anecdotes from various friends detailing the different approaches they’ve received.

We’ve heard a lot of great ones but none so far beat the “Tactical Chaplain.” Since this guy is supposedly a Chaplain, we’ll leave his name out of it, but his story is something that must be shared.

Apparently, a rather prominent tactical manufacturer received a T&E request from an owner of an e-mail address that indicated he was assigned to the United States Army Special Operations Command. Naturally, this received a lot of attention and it was passed to the guy who handles SOF customers. He related that the email contained several of the right buzz words but that they weren’t quite used in the right context. And, he referred to himself as a “Tactical Chaplain.” On a hunch, and in order to make sure it was all cool with the government customer, the email was forwarded to the US Army Special Forces Command G8 which is in charge of Force Modernization. The compass check was a good call. It appears there are no Combat Chaplains assigned to G8. Instead, a senior SF NCO at G8 read the email and his BS meter pegged. The way it was written didn’t make sense and he couldn’t figure out what a “Tactical Chaplain” was. He called the Tactical Chaplain out and asked him to explain his request as well as the nature of the evaluations he was conducting. Tactical Chaplain apparently thought counseling the troops meant talking kit. As for the more traditional duties of a Man of God? Well, Tactical Chaplain ain’t got time for that.

This is the Tactical Chaplain’s response to an inquiry for explanation from G8:

These reviews are informal in nature but often helpful to the individuals involved. No CDD work implied. I am actually in the process of moving from the military space to the federal space. As a tactical Chaplain, I am often asked for gear review and recommendation (at a team level). My prior service (USMC) included time as an engineer and armorer – so I enjoy the T&E process. I have no experience with Company X and it was recommended to me to investigate their products.

Here is the Force Mod NCO’s response:

Sir,

Your email to the Company X representative stated, “Annually, I am responsible to locate, evaluate and quantify items of tactical gear based on operation needs.”

This statement is misleading to industry. You also have a USASOC email address. Again, this is misleading to industry as it implies that your scope of duties include testing and evaluating kit for USASOC. You are not authorized to conduct T/E for USASOC. If you are a member of this command, then you are not allowed to conduct T/E period, unless selected to do so by a combat developer from this command.

Your actions could cause legal ramifications to yourself and this command.

Turns out, Tactical Chaplain is in transition to the ‘government sector’ from his military duties. As for the follow up? Well, Tactical Chaplain ain’t got time for that. But, if you’re in industry and get a request to T&E a combat crucifix you might want to oblige. Otherwise, if it’s about anything else, you’ll probably say you ain’t got time for that.

Ok, Who Called the Troop on Leave Asking Him to Come Back Early for a Class A Inspection?

Friday, January 3rd, 2014

I know it happened, who was it?

In Case You Wondered What An ICBM Reentry Looks Like

Saturday, December 28th, 2013

This video of a Russian ICBM during Reentry to the atmosphere was taken at the the Kura Test Range, located in northern Kamchatka Krai, a Russian Federation territory north of Japan. Amazingly, for decades, the United States developed permanent facilities in nearby Alaska in order to monitor testing at Kura but now hand held video is freely posted to the internet.