FirstSpear TV

You’ve Been Warned

Today, since it’s a day off for most of you, go to the store and purchase a box of Depends undergarments. Each morning, before you open SSD, put them on. We aren’t going to be responsible if you don’t.

Over the next week we are going to show you several things that are going to make you sh!t your pants. It’s that simple. The Soldier Systems industry needs to be prepared for several bowel shaking paradigm shifts. No hints or other teasers until each shocker is released.

Don’t forget to wear those undergarments and don’t read SSD while you’re driving, operating heavy machinery or in a meeting where sh!tting your pants will result in embarrassment or worse.

You’ve been warned.

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21 Responses to “You’ve Been Warned”

  1. Lou Arthur says:

    This is one hardcore teaser ad… hooah.

  2. Glenn says:

    I guess I can just read SSD while sitting on the toilet.

  3. Philip says:

    As good a way as any to keep thing regular. Bring it.

  4. steve says:

    Bring it Adam

  5. Sal Palma says:

    ROFLMFAO!!! HA HA!! You’ve outdone yourself…

  6. Lasse says:

    rollin’ commando, I might have some issues with SSD the time to come.

  7. deadcat says:

    Gangster, I knew I bought this iPad for something! Bring it.

  8. Corsair8X says:

    I usually read this on the train. I almost pity those bastards.

  9. Steve H says:

    I pooped a bit just reading this…

  10. Ben says:

    SSD makes me get fresh pants? Worth It.

  11. Clayton says:

    I just had a thrill run up my leg…

  12. Fox says:

    I’m easely impressed, so I guess I’ll got with a bullet proof protection and wear a Molicare Super diaper. I hear those things can wistand bricks.

    I can’t wait. Or maybe not.
    (o:

  13. Tim Ellwood says:

    Just back from “Tactical Teds Surplus and more” with a box of multi-cam Depends. they will also work great at SHOT show. Can’t wait for the news.

  14. Brian says:

    awww shit…I can’t wait

  15. Taylor says:

    Good thing “Oops I Crapped My Pants” sure can hold a lot of dung.

  16. Rob says:

    I’ll also put my seatbealt on…where the fuck is the “oh shit” handle?!

  17. Thomas Jane says:

    Can you just promise that none of it involves zombies. I don’t know how much more “zombie loadouts” and Zombiemax ammo and MLZK I can take before I shit myself.

  18. John says:

    warned!? Teased is more like it!