Over the weekend we posted a story about trolls. While there was some pure gold in the comments, this one stood out head and shoulders above the rest. Mr Janky, we salute you!
It’s a shame that those of us that come to SSD for a daily industry update are continually subjected to the ramblings of the poser douche.
The poser douche knows everything about everything. He’s on the side of socialism when the rest of us are on the side capitalism.
He was never issued a specific weapon but he knows more about it than those who put thousands upon thousands of rounds through the one they were issued by Uncle Sam.
He’s also a manufacturing guru and knows the cost of labor and business.
The poser douche can spot a counterfeit or knock-off widget a mile away on FB or Instagram. He almost always calls them out online even if the company he defends knocked off the widget that’s been in the hands of real users for years.
The poser douche loves all of the JSOC buzz words and uses them extensively.
He’s also a textiles and fabrics expert and requests online that everyone hurry up to make products to support his needs (think Tiger Stripe webbing or something similarly unimportant).
The poser douche holds his gear/apparel to a higher standard and he loves this forum because he can show off his tactical-know-how-prowess (X course he attended with X instructor).
The poser douche is also very clever and sometimes just comments “+1” when a real user jumps in the conversation. Instant cred!
Cost is very important to the poser douche because he doesn’t get issued the cool guy stuff. It’s very likely that he combs eBay for used items (usually AOR camo stuff).
The poser douche usually name drops as a part of his vernacular. It may be his favorite instructor or his favorite tier 1 unit- these vary depending on world events or social media stature.
The poser douche can instantly identify other poser douches online. He usually calls them out with comments such as “cool story bro” or makes the casual “+1” when someone else legit calls them out.
Here’s to you, poser douche! May you fester in online anonymity!
-Mr Janky
